Advice dating love online widowhood
Though I’d experienced nothing but encouragement from my and Graham’s friends and family, there will be people who read this and question, as I did many times, whether I should have moved on so quickly or even at all. There are people who don’t know what to say to you or, worse, say nothing and allow your friendship to wither.
Far from despairing as I dissolved into tears in the cocktail bar that night, he offered words of comfort and understanding, just as he had from the moment we were introduced by a mutual friend in January 2009.It’s hard to pinpoint the moment we fell in love, possibly the day in February 1997 when we were walking through Cardiff — where Graham was doing a gap year — and he turned and kissed me for the first time.During Christmas 2006 we had a magical holiday cruising down the Nile. I could picture Graham tumbling around our garden with a young brood and he’d tease me with off-the-wall Cornish (his home county) names he wanted for our children.Still, I longed to build a future with someone special.When I mentioned this one morning in the school staff room, a colleague declared she had a single male friend, Richard, she thought would be perfect for me.He was dating a girl I knew at Cambridge and a group of us became friends.
When their relationship ended, we saw each other platonically.
Thankfully, Sue stepped in and gently coaxed me towards a second date.
I was already falling for Rich, but as our relationship progressed guilt would often eat me up, usually after we’d enjoyed dinner, a film or a walk in the countryside — things Graham and I used to love, too.
The following Saturday I got a text from Richard introducing himself and asking if I’d like to meet for drinks in Cheltenham.
Agreeing to a date with Rich, who’s a web designer and at 36 is two years younger than me, felt like betraying Graham.
How dare I feel so happy with this man when I was still so obviously in love with someone else? I still dreamed of him and slept with his jumper under my pillow.