If you feel like that, do yourself a favor and hightail it back to monogamy.That isn't the real issue with polyamory, though. When an audience member asked what the biggest downside was, all the panelists shouted in unison: “Scheduling!
It’s a sick feeling in their gut telling them this is not the right relationship to be in.If I’m jealous because my husband has his girlfriend sleeping over three nights this week, I’m inclined to look at how I’m getting – or not getting – my needs met in my relationship with him.It’s not his sleepovers with her that are the problem, it’s that we haven’t had enough time together lately. Some people – maybe most people - really are jealous simply because their honey likes someone else.In fact, I’ve never been in a monogamous relationship.This openness in my romantic life stems in part from feminism and in part from idealism. I can’t stomach the thought of handing the reins of my sexual life to someone else, even someone I love and trust as much as my husband. Being open in my marriage comes from the same ideals that make me shop at the food co-op and vote for socialist political candidates.It takes a lot of emotional energy, and an ongoing commitment to complexity, to make those relationships work. Sierra Black lives in the Boston area with her family.
She is a frequent contributor to Babble, and blogs about her family life at Childwild. Patent and Trademark Office as a trademark of Salon Media Group Inc.
There’s a pile of scientific evidence showing that a new sex partner is the most surefire cure for sexual dysfunction and low libido, especially for women.
It’s much easier to keep the sparks flying with someone whose laundry you don’t have to fold. At its worst, this kind of arrangement can sap energy from a struggling marriage.
But if the claims that he once asked his ex-wife, Marianne, for an open marriage are true, then we might be more alike than I thought.
Unlike that alleged scenario, however (which began with an affair), my husband's and my open marriage has been based on openness and honesty from day one.
Remember that idyllic weekend my girlfriend and I had? Eventually, many people who like each other as much as we do get married. Now, to the jealousy question: If the thought of your lover being with someone else makes your stomach turn, polyamory probably isn’t for you.