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Giving compliments costs you nothing, and wins friends. E.g., if a well-dressed woman is driving a beat-up old car, say that she looks like a woman that blues musicians write songs about.

Women shouldn't wear "trend of the minute" clothes. Creating your dream home may lead to your dream relationship. In House as a Mirror of Self: Exploring the Deeper Meaning of Home, by Clare Cooper Marcus and James Yandell (1995), the chapter "Becoming Partners: Power Struggles in Making a Home Together" shows how homes cause or solve relationship problems.But unlike the scoundrels mentioned above, even when he does finally realize the feelings of the girls around him, he never tries to take advantage of them.He usually ends up digging himself in deeper, because by this time, he's come to care for all of them, even if just as friends, and doesn't want to break their hearts, or lose any of them if/when he finally chooses the girl he really loves. Crank this magnetism up and then Even the Guys Want Him.If you play softball, don't interrupt a group of women talking, to ask one woman if she wants to practice catching pop-ups. Don't limit your flirting to attractive, single persons of the opposite sex. Compliment old men, women pushing strollers in the park, the person behind you in the supermarket line, and your in-laws. This makes it easier to flirt with two persons of the opposite sex (e.g., two women). The kid will grin and excitedly play peek-a-boo with you. If you see two women or a group of women, or two men or a group of men, you can't approach and start talking to one individual. Tip your server $20 to give your card to your object of desire.When you meet an attractive, single person of the opposite sex, you'll feel more confident. After an interaction, discuss with your friend what you did right and wrong. Your note should tell him or her to meet you in another room, out of sight of his or her companions, in five minutes.The conventional wisdom is that "men court, then women choose." Reality is the opposite. Women who follow "the rules" and passively wait get the 20% of men that other women don't want often find that "the good ones are taken" by women who take an active role in courtship. We invented a game to play in the front yard, and played happily all afternoon. If an unfamiliar man approaches a woman, her reaction is, "I don't know you. Leave me alone." Even a man who has been with his girlfriend for years will sometimes have trouble making her open up in the way she does with her own grilfriends. I asked her questions on the run out-"Where are you from" "Where do you work," etc. On the run back a woman asked her the same questions-and she happily chatted away, answering in long paragraphs.

Instead, a woman should choose the man she wants to court her -"women choose, then men court." E.g., the French romantic comedy Amélie charmed audiences with a young woman pursuing a young man-by making him pursue her. The girl threw dirty water from their wading pool on me. Some women are friendly, easily talk to men, and right away make you feel that they genuinely like you.

I was once asked to babysit a five-year-old girl and a three-year-old boy. These women are all married to great, loving husbands, and for good reason. Make eye contact, smile, compliment, and then make the person feel special.

To get a shy woman to "open up" and become friendly, do something fun with other people. E.g., on the run, if I'd happily chatted with a group of men and women (instead of trying to talk to her alone), she would've wanted to join our discussion. Sooner or later, you'll notice a woman quietly watching you, waiting for an invitation. You can also use mirroring strategy where you subtly imitate the person's movements and establish a common connection. Go out with a same-sex friend (e.g., a man goes out with a male friend). Peek-a-boo is how we attract another person's attention. We love it when a mild-mannered character removes his disguise and reveals himself as James Bond. Make eye contact from a distance, and then look away. Repeat the eye contact-then-hide cycle for several minutes. If you're a man, don't get discouraged if your object of desire seems to have only the slightest interest in you. E.g., making eye contact via your compact's mirror won't register with most guys.

In contrast, a 34-year-old divorcée with two children, a house she's lived in for six years, a car she's driven for eight years, and a job she's had for ten years will be harder to date. The annoyance of the disruption overrules the possible enjoyment of a new romance. Playing games invites the person to lie or play games. If a person says "maybe," or doesn't return your call or e-mail, assume that the person means "no." Ask someone else out. Women's clothes draw attention to their breasts, waist, and hips.

To meet new people, create a transition point in your life. If the person says "no," thank him or her for the clear answer. He should ask his supervisor to give him a more impressive job title. Depending on whether adolescence or maturity is in fashion, women's clothes either emphasize a flat stomach and thin legs, or make strong, sweeping curves to suggest fertility.

According to the "the rules," women sit by the phone waiting for men to call.